You in the Vatican, me in court

The former director of Catalonia’s Anti-Fraud Office, judge Daniel de Alfonso, is back in court. Back on the bench, to be precise. And Spain’s hitherto acting Home Secretary, Jorge Fernández, is a likely candidate to become the next Spanish ambassador to the Vatican City.

(And now please allow me to pause while I pinch myself —by all means, feel free to follow my lead— just to double-check that this is not a nightmare, but something even worse: reality; let’s move on, shall we?)

De Alfonso asked the governing body of Spain’s judiciary to resume his career as a judge and he has been given the thumbs up. He is entitled to that, thanks to article 335 of the Spanish law that deals with judges who take leave while tasked with special assignments. But given how very special the assignment was in his previous job, this is clearly not on. Not by a mile. It’s outrageous, actually (1).

The PP leadership must find a way for —by far— the worst minister in the history of this democracy —I apologise for calling his actions “democratic”— to go away for good, but contented. And it has occurred to them that the Vatican City might be right up his alley, which I would take issue with. A self-serving, compulsive liar who has sown dissent and awarded decorations to the Guardia Civil officers who physically abused migrants should never get a place near the Pope. And nobody should ever consider Jorge Fernández for such a post. Still, the appointment would be so shocking that it would presumably sit well with the logic of Rajoy’s lot. A decision like that would never merit God’s forgiveness, but it would certainly be blessed by a rather infernal establishment.

Now go and tell all this to a seventeen year old lad. Play him the sickening tapes and tell him what the consequences have been for the two lowlifes. And then tell him: “you see, lad? This is the judicial, political and moral system we have in store for you. And, above all, keep the faith”.

(1) N.T. While on a special assignment to lead Catalonia’s Anti-Fraud Office, judge de Alfonso was caught on tape plotting a smear campaign with Spain’s Home Secretary against Catalan separatist leaders. He refused to resign, but was dismissed by the Catalan parliament a few days later.